We don't need a news bulliten here... it's Christmas time! I am proud to say that I think I finally "get it". I am thankful that my eyes are open and I see what this most blessed miracle of Christmas is all about.
God. Patience. Peace. Warmth. Love. Diligence. Happiness. Pleasure in the small things. Family. Good friends. Time spent (NOT money!). It's much more simple than most people think, I believe.
This year, I decided to make this a more simple, homespun Christmas. I have slumped over my sewing machine for hours on end, braided beautiful clearance-priced yarn until my hands are cramping, baked until I cannot stand the smell of sweets (O.K., that may be stretching the truth a little), melted old records, foraged the fabric department at Hobby Lobby, rummaged through buttons, cut up old dress shirts, painted to my heart's delight, and racked my brain (and Pinterest) until I could almost barf from all the lovely ideas I'd love to make for the people (and even the animals) I love and respect. In this crazy process of "pinning" I have made some of the most awesome gifts for people I hold most dear. My Sassy girl even got in on the action! What person doesn't love a handmade gift from a small child? We've made handprint Christmas trees, glow-in-the dark slime (ha!), snowglobes, salt dough ornaments... she is quite the little artist! I believe she has learned more from crafting at home with Mama than she would have being dragged through countless stores buying, buying, buying. This saved me some stress, too - a 3 year old doesn't tend to enjoy browsing the aisles for the perfect gift. She thinks everyone should have Tinkerbell Color Wonder paper! And the time spent with my favorite little girl? Priceless! So, the gift part of my mission is *almost* accomplished... and that's O.K. I still have two days to finish "the list" and that's plenty of time!
I realize this doesn't sound too simple to many people. I know it's easier for some to buy online and at stores. I did a little bit of that myself. But see, I am blessed with time at home and the ability to prioritze on my hands, so that helps and I use my time as wisely as I can. Sure, I have laundry going, a curious/whining/excited child pounding me with questions and demands, three pets begging for scraps, attention, and potty time, a disaster area of a kitchen and living room begging to be cleaned, dust piling up, and meals cooking while I work. But when I get an idea in my head it just has to be done and I'm not happy until it is complete (although with Motherhood I've learned to scratch the less important tasks if I get stressed). If it's truly important to me, it gets done eventually. Thank you, Mom, for teaching me the art of multi-tasking. Thank you, Coke Zero, for the hours of extra energy you've provided me to do so.
I did well by the people I love this year if I do say so myself. My husband and I will not exchange - we haven't, really, since our little one was born. I don't need much. Just having him here, as well as his trust, his patience, and his support in my crazy ideas and ramblings is enough for me. His love and our marriage is a gift in itself and I recognize that nothing else matters. My Mom beamed with pride when I told her a few days ago, "I am a wife and Mother first, everything else second.". For those who don't know it, my hubby sells cars. He beats the pavement every day to support our family and does it with honesty, patience, and pride (yes, there are good people out there selling cars, folks!). What a gem he is and I am thankful every day! We're just content buying and making old things new again for our daughter. This year, she will get some of the toys she asked for, some she did not, and even an old school desk we found and will "pretty up" to her liking when we re-do her room this winter. We both feel fortunate that we can do that, as we're very aware that some parents cannot.
I enjoy focusing on gifts from the heart for the people who have helped us through this sometimes rough period of "new marriage". It brings me much pleasure to finish a project for one of those people. I don't much care if said project takes me three hours (or an entire day!) to complete. I remind myself often of this: how many hours has this person spent thinking about/ supporting/ counseling us? That very thought makes it simple for me to spend an entire day focusing on something I believe will make him/her happy and let them know I appreciate him/her.
There is no better feeling than having someone say, "You made this for ME? I love it!".
That all being said, I must sew! Whether your Christmas is simple, homespun, sparkly, or expensive, I hope it's a joyous one. But please, for me, take a moment to stop and take a look around at some point in this season. Be thankful for what you have in the people you love. If you and your loved ones are healthy, thank God. If they or you are not please be thankful you have yet another day with them. Remember to show kindness to everyone you meet (even the ones who drive you close to the brink of craziness!). Be patient with your over-excited and over-stimulated children. Take a breather if you need one, and do not feel the least bit guilty for doing so. Do a good deed for someone in need. Go out of your way for someone you love and/or respect, and that doesn't mean buying the most expensive gift you can find. Scrape the frost off your neighbor's windows, buy the person in the drive-thru line behind you a meal, send a soldier a thank you note, smile at and thank that frazzled woman checking out your groceries, turn off the TV and take some time to tell your children about what Christmas was like when you were little. Just be nice! In the end, you've made someone smile and in these times, that is the best gift for him/her AND you!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!
Love,
Dani
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
An Army Behind Us
Last weekend I attended my 15 year high school reunion in my hometown. It was a whirlwind experience to say the least! I survived with hardly any sleep combined with too little to eat... and yes, I drank my weight in beer. By the time I pulled back in my own drive on Sunday night, my mind was reeling, my feet were swollen and blistered beyond recognition, my eyes were burning and blood red, but I was sporting a big ole grin. It was all worth it. More than a week later, I am just now coming down off that "Homestead Weekend Buzz" and have given great thought to all the things I learned (or finally realized, rather) over those 3 days.
I graduated from a school in Shawnee Mission, Kansas, but did most of my growing up in Princeton, Illinois. Although I hold both places very dear to my heart, Princeton will always be "home". The house I lived in when I was brought home from the hospital as a newborn is still there. It's where most of my family still lives. It's where I ran and played in the creeks and cemetaries with my friends, sustained my first broken bone in dance class, had "secret" forts all over town, learned to ride my bike, received my first kiss, and the list goes on and on as far as my memory will allow. Until the day I die, I will always feel a connection with Princeton. Most of all, that connection lies within the people who used to live there, or still do.
When you grow up in a small town, you automatically have an "army" of friends behind you forever if you choose it to be that way (which I do!). The best part is, that "army" may not have even been the people you hung around in school. This would be my favorite part of growing older, having an open mind and heart, and still having a bond with my small town. See, I was a shy one when I was younger so I was only really close to just a few kids. Some of those people have gone from my current life, and that's probably for the better. Some I miss dearly. Some are still a part of my daily life. But now that I've, ahem, "found my voice" and am allowing more people into my circle of trust, I'm growing to love and appreciate the people who associated with differing crowds as well. I am blessed to have those "new" old acquaintances back in my life for a second chance at friendship. If it were up to me, I'd never lose track of any of them again.
Just in the last year, I've had to call in my Princeton troops for support quite a few times. It always amazes me the amount of people who will rush to my aid with just a text, a quick phone call, or a shout-out on Facebook. In the same breath, I would drop everything if someone in Princeton needed me... I have, actually, and haven't thought twice about it. You know, I've heard it said that "small towns build you up". I agree with that statement although I don't think it's the town. It's the people in it. Small towns have an unspoken bond among their residents (past and present), and I'm grateful to still be a part of it. I am equally thankful that I see it. Some don't.
So, thank you, my friends. You are the ones who make my hometown a place to be proud of, a place I know I'm always welcome at someone's house even if I'm a hot mess (or better yet, on a spastic roll and looking for fun!), a place I can be myself without worrying that I'll never be invited back, and a place where we can all gather and have good times despite our differences. Simply stated, we grew up together, and that seems to be enough for most. It's enough for me. You build me up and I hope I build you up. Life can be rough but as long as we always have a place to call home and that built-in army behind us, it will be okay.
Don't believe me? Call. I'll answer.
Much Love - Dani
I graduated from a school in Shawnee Mission, Kansas, but did most of my growing up in Princeton, Illinois. Although I hold both places very dear to my heart, Princeton will always be "home". The house I lived in when I was brought home from the hospital as a newborn is still there. It's where most of my family still lives. It's where I ran and played in the creeks and cemetaries with my friends, sustained my first broken bone in dance class, had "secret" forts all over town, learned to ride my bike, received my first kiss, and the list goes on and on as far as my memory will allow. Until the day I die, I will always feel a connection with Princeton. Most of all, that connection lies within the people who used to live there, or still do.
When you grow up in a small town, you automatically have an "army" of friends behind you forever if you choose it to be that way (which I do!). The best part is, that "army" may not have even been the people you hung around in school. This would be my favorite part of growing older, having an open mind and heart, and still having a bond with my small town. See, I was a shy one when I was younger so I was only really close to just a few kids. Some of those people have gone from my current life, and that's probably for the better. Some I miss dearly. Some are still a part of my daily life. But now that I've, ahem, "found my voice" and am allowing more people into my circle of trust, I'm growing to love and appreciate the people who associated with differing crowds as well. I am blessed to have those "new" old acquaintances back in my life for a second chance at friendship. If it were up to me, I'd never lose track of any of them again.
Just in the last year, I've had to call in my Princeton troops for support quite a few times. It always amazes me the amount of people who will rush to my aid with just a text, a quick phone call, or a shout-out on Facebook. In the same breath, I would drop everything if someone in Princeton needed me... I have, actually, and haven't thought twice about it. You know, I've heard it said that "small towns build you up". I agree with that statement although I don't think it's the town. It's the people in it. Small towns have an unspoken bond among their residents (past and present), and I'm grateful to still be a part of it. I am equally thankful that I see it. Some don't.
So, thank you, my friends. You are the ones who make my hometown a place to be proud of, a place I know I'm always welcome at someone's house even if I'm a hot mess (or better yet, on a spastic roll and looking for fun!), a place I can be myself without worrying that I'll never be invited back, and a place where we can all gather and have good times despite our differences. Simply stated, we grew up together, and that seems to be enough for most. It's enough for me. You build me up and I hope I build you up. Life can be rough but as long as we always have a place to call home and that built-in army behind us, it will be okay.
Don't believe me? Call. I'll answer.
Much Love - Dani
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
My 12 Steps
I must have nine lives. Either that, or one worn out guardian angel who refuses to give up and let me fall. She simply must be as wise and as feisty as I. Something "clicked" in my brain a few weeks ago, and I'm thankful that I heard it. My angel needs a break and it's my turn to take the wheel! I realized it's time for some changes lest I risk losing everyone and everything I hold dear, my own self included. But, "I am not afraid. I was born for this." (Joan of Arc).
As a friend of mine has said, "You can only ignore the signs from the universe for so long.". By backing down, listening, and watching I will win this fight. What fight? Well, that's for me to know and you to find out eventually. I found this new outlet just in time, thanks to my friend, JG. My very own blog? Brilliant! Maybe, just maybe, I can help someone else along my journey? That is yet to be determined. Hell, I'm not even sure that this will help ME, but it's worth a shot.
I have been Googling and "Liking" on Facebook like a mad woman, searching for a plan to follow. Alas, there was something missing from each one. They were all someone else's plan and if you know me, you know that just won't do. That all being said, I scribbled down my very own 12 step program yesterday morning, inspired by AA's 12 steps. I will adjust this plan as I see fit, as it's MY plan and I can do that! You know, I don't even know where it all came from but as it turns out, it makes good sense (to me, at least).
If it works for you, awesome! If it doesn't, no worries. I won't be offended. It may help you adopt a plan of your own, make you giggle, make you think, make no sense, or simply go unread. Truth? As much as I'd love to help someone else, it doesn't matter to me in the end. I am only responsible for myself. All I can do is follow this plan to the best of my ability, keep striving for success, and look forward to my best life. So, here goes.
1. Keep your nest clean. Home is your base. If it's filled with dirt, stains, bad smells, piles of junk, and unfinished projects, how are you ever supposed to wake up each day with a clear head? It seems so simple doesn't it? If so, TACKLE it. If you can't be comfortable at home, you're not going to be comfortable anywhere, including your own skin. If it's not going to be an easy task, ask for help. Someone who cares will come to your aid. Heck, ask me! I love to clean (although I don't do toilets unless they're mine).
2. Forgive yourself first, worry about forgiving others second. Trust me when I say if anyone deserves a second, third, fourth, etc. chance, it's YOU. Make a concious decision to stop being so hard on yourself and start living again. Then you can rightfully decide who in your life deserves YOUR forgiveness. Follow your gut. It won't lead you astray. If you make a mistake and get burned again, HEY! It's okay. Forgive yourself again, consider it a lesson learned, and move on. Yes, I think it's that simple. Now DO IT.
3. Up your self-value. You are the shopkeeper of your heart and soul. Up your prices! Not everyone deserves you in their life. Spread yourself too thin, and the ones who do truly need you get only a small portion of beautiful you. Now, that's not fair for anyone, is it? Which brings me to my next step...
4. Embrace the good people in your life and never let them go. They are there for a reason and it's most likely that they love you. Love them back with every inch of your body and soul. Accept them for who they are, just as they have done for you.
5. Give yourself permission to start over every day if need be. If you're lucky enough to have woken up on the right side of the grass, you can make the outcome of every single day exactly how you want. Sure, there may be lots of road blocks in a day, but you have the ability to accept and deal with them how you please. I say step on the gas and crash through the damn things! Did that visual make you smile? Yeah, me too. Keep your sense of humor and you'll be fine! Oh, and remember once "today" is over, it will never be again. Remember any lessons learned and leave the day behind you, where it belongs.
6. Find beauty in the smallest of things. Use all your senses to smoothly glide you through life's battles. Look, listen, taste, and touch if you feel the urge. If you don't have that urge, please keep trying. I guarantee SOMETHING tiny will make you smile each day if you keep an open mind. All it takes is for you to recognize it and snatch it up. Remember that a whole bunch of tiny things thrown into a pile equal something big.
7. Give and accept gifts freely. Gifts don't have to be something you hold in your hand. It could be a compliment, a favor, time, attention... you get what you give (eventually), but it's not about what you receive in return. Keep giving, regardless. If someone gives YOU a gift, say "thank you" and know that you deserve it.
8. Keep breathing! I was recently made aware that what I always thought was just "zoning out" is actually called meditation. Close your eyes , focus, and breathe whenever you can. Feel the coolness of your breath entering and leaving your body. Gently shoo away those nagging thoughts and worries. They may seem a little less nagging once you glide back into reality. If not, repeat as often as desired! (Thanks, Dr. Ian!)
9. If it does more harm than good, ditch it. This can include, but is not limited to: people, habits, substances, pre-conceived notions, and material possessions. Trust me when I say, the less you haul around with you every day, the better. Travel light and and use your energy on things that make you truly, madly, and deeply happy.
10. Keep forging ahead. Thanks, L, for this one. Humans were made to walk forward for a reason. It's okay if you stop to rest as long as you hop back up and keep going. In my opinion, it's also okay to look back as long as it's without regrets and you learned something. But in the end always, always put your beautiful face forward towards that sun and keep on walkin'!
11. Be brutally honest with yourself and others. Secrets don't do anyone any good (unless it comes to explaining the death of a hamster to a three year old, in my humble opinion). It's much easier to keep your story straight if it's always the truth. If you simply must lie to protect someone, prepare to be called out. Remember that the person you're trying to protect most likely needs the truth and will appreciate it much more than being sheltered. It's not really up to you to decide what's best for another person.
12. Find a higher power and work to make it/him/her proud. If you find solace in a religion, nature, science, etc., grasp it and go forth with gusto. Everyone needs "something else" to focus on besides themselves at times. As hard as it's been for me to accept this, it's not all about me all the time. That sounds terribly selfish, doesn't it? Please see number 11. Sometimes you just need to let go of all control and hope a higher power will guide you.
So, that's it. This will most likely be my longest post ever... I've been storing a lot up in my 33 years and these are only a few of the things I've learned. Now, if I can just remember to use them! If you read the whole thing, thank you. For those that didn't make it past the first paragraph, I hope you'll stick around and keep reading. This is gonna be good. I just know it.
A huge thank you to ALL of the people in my life: my friends, foes, and loves. If you're not around anymore, I'll just assume that's fate and thank my stars for the lesson you most likely blessed me with. If you are still around, it's because I want you here and I appreciate you.
Much love.... Dani
As a friend of mine has said, "You can only ignore the signs from the universe for so long.". By backing down, listening, and watching I will win this fight. What fight? Well, that's for me to know and you to find out eventually. I found this new outlet just in time, thanks to my friend, JG. My very own blog? Brilliant! Maybe, just maybe, I can help someone else along my journey? That is yet to be determined. Hell, I'm not even sure that this will help ME, but it's worth a shot.
I have been Googling and "Liking" on Facebook like a mad woman, searching for a plan to follow. Alas, there was something missing from each one. They were all someone else's plan and if you know me, you know that just won't do. That all being said, I scribbled down my very own 12 step program yesterday morning, inspired by AA's 12 steps. I will adjust this plan as I see fit, as it's MY plan and I can do that! You know, I don't even know where it all came from but as it turns out, it makes good sense (to me, at least).
If it works for you, awesome! If it doesn't, no worries. I won't be offended. It may help you adopt a plan of your own, make you giggle, make you think, make no sense, or simply go unread. Truth? As much as I'd love to help someone else, it doesn't matter to me in the end. I am only responsible for myself. All I can do is follow this plan to the best of my ability, keep striving for success, and look forward to my best life. So, here goes.
1. Keep your nest clean. Home is your base. If it's filled with dirt, stains, bad smells, piles of junk, and unfinished projects, how are you ever supposed to wake up each day with a clear head? It seems so simple doesn't it? If so, TACKLE it. If you can't be comfortable at home, you're not going to be comfortable anywhere, including your own skin. If it's not going to be an easy task, ask for help. Someone who cares will come to your aid. Heck, ask me! I love to clean (although I don't do toilets unless they're mine).
2. Forgive yourself first, worry about forgiving others second. Trust me when I say if anyone deserves a second, third, fourth, etc. chance, it's YOU. Make a concious decision to stop being so hard on yourself and start living again. Then you can rightfully decide who in your life deserves YOUR forgiveness. Follow your gut. It won't lead you astray. If you make a mistake and get burned again, HEY! It's okay. Forgive yourself again, consider it a lesson learned, and move on. Yes, I think it's that simple. Now DO IT.
3. Up your self-value. You are the shopkeeper of your heart and soul. Up your prices! Not everyone deserves you in their life. Spread yourself too thin, and the ones who do truly need you get only a small portion of beautiful you. Now, that's not fair for anyone, is it? Which brings me to my next step...
4. Embrace the good people in your life and never let them go. They are there for a reason and it's most likely that they love you. Love them back with every inch of your body and soul. Accept them for who they are, just as they have done for you.
5. Give yourself permission to start over every day if need be. If you're lucky enough to have woken up on the right side of the grass, you can make the outcome of every single day exactly how you want. Sure, there may be lots of road blocks in a day, but you have the ability to accept and deal with them how you please. I say step on the gas and crash through the damn things! Did that visual make you smile? Yeah, me too. Keep your sense of humor and you'll be fine! Oh, and remember once "today" is over, it will never be again. Remember any lessons learned and leave the day behind you, where it belongs.
6. Find beauty in the smallest of things. Use all your senses to smoothly glide you through life's battles. Look, listen, taste, and touch if you feel the urge. If you don't have that urge, please keep trying. I guarantee SOMETHING tiny will make you smile each day if you keep an open mind. All it takes is for you to recognize it and snatch it up. Remember that a whole bunch of tiny things thrown into a pile equal something big.
7. Give and accept gifts freely. Gifts don't have to be something you hold in your hand. It could be a compliment, a favor, time, attention... you get what you give (eventually), but it's not about what you receive in return. Keep giving, regardless. If someone gives YOU a gift, say "thank you" and know that you deserve it.
8. Keep breathing! I was recently made aware that what I always thought was just "zoning out" is actually called meditation. Close your eyes , focus, and breathe whenever you can. Feel the coolness of your breath entering and leaving your body. Gently shoo away those nagging thoughts and worries. They may seem a little less nagging once you glide back into reality. If not, repeat as often as desired! (Thanks, Dr. Ian!)
9. If it does more harm than good, ditch it. This can include, but is not limited to: people, habits, substances, pre-conceived notions, and material possessions. Trust me when I say, the less you haul around with you every day, the better. Travel light and and use your energy on things that make you truly, madly, and deeply happy.
10. Keep forging ahead. Thanks, L, for this one. Humans were made to walk forward for a reason. It's okay if you stop to rest as long as you hop back up and keep going. In my opinion, it's also okay to look back as long as it's without regrets and you learned something. But in the end always, always put your beautiful face forward towards that sun and keep on walkin'!
11. Be brutally honest with yourself and others. Secrets don't do anyone any good (unless it comes to explaining the death of a hamster to a three year old, in my humble opinion). It's much easier to keep your story straight if it's always the truth. If you simply must lie to protect someone, prepare to be called out. Remember that the person you're trying to protect most likely needs the truth and will appreciate it much more than being sheltered. It's not really up to you to decide what's best for another person.
12. Find a higher power and work to make it/him/her proud. If you find solace in a religion, nature, science, etc., grasp it and go forth with gusto. Everyone needs "something else" to focus on besides themselves at times. As hard as it's been for me to accept this, it's not all about me all the time. That sounds terribly selfish, doesn't it? Please see number 11. Sometimes you just need to let go of all control and hope a higher power will guide you.
So, that's it. This will most likely be my longest post ever... I've been storing a lot up in my 33 years and these are only a few of the things I've learned. Now, if I can just remember to use them! If you read the whole thing, thank you. For those that didn't make it past the first paragraph, I hope you'll stick around and keep reading. This is gonna be good. I just know it.
A huge thank you to ALL of the people in my life: my friends, foes, and loves. If you're not around anymore, I'll just assume that's fate and thank my stars for the lesson you most likely blessed me with. If you are still around, it's because I want you here and I appreciate you.
Much love.... Dani
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